As a new foster parent who just completed mountains of paperwork and all the necessary training, you may wonder what exactly is next. Cherie Johnson, Foster and Adoptive Parent, shares her experience as a new foster parent with some action steps you and your family can take to prepare.
Am I doing anything right? This question could easily be muttered by my teenagers or by me. Daily. Hourly. Parenting teenagers is no easy feat, especially parenting teens with traumatic backgrounds. Learning to parent your teenager's inner child while they emerge as a young adult can help you navigate this difficult stage.
A common misconception of teenagers in foster care is they did something bad or wrong to end up there, but many teens end up in foster care at no fault of their own. Just like any other age group, teens in foster care want a secure, loving family. There are several benefits of becoming a foster parent that are unique to this age group.
I am a foster parent. I was given all the training and tools my brain could absorb about development, trauma, how to build relationships, how to repair relationships, ways to manage difficult behavior, and tips for self-care. I love to learn, and I love putting new information into practice. I feel like I parent well. And yet on the toughest of days, there are times I wonder, “What are we doing? Are we even helping?” and, “What if nothing works?”
We fill up with sunshine when we see victory in our children’s lives, and the moment we start to let our shoulders drop in relaxation, another storm comes seemingly out of nowhere. But that does not mean healing isn’t happening. It means that it is layered and multifaceted and complex. It means that trauma goes deep, and so must healing.
If you have a family of your own and are inquiring to be a foster family, conversations with your partner and children are crucial. Below are some of the topics our foster parents discussed with their families and children before deciding to start their foster care journey.
Foster care is a term many families use with pride, providing support and guidance for many children and teens in our communities. Fostering is the opportunity to encourage growth, healing, and healthy relationships in hopes families will reach their full potential. As common as the term “care” is, it can be hard to achieve for many families.
As foster parents, the worries arise as they are preparing a room for the new child they received a brief description of. They ask themselves: how do we ensure they feel supported; what resources will they need on days like this; how can we ease the stress they might feel; how do we create a welcoming environment and create a positive transition?