As the school year is now in full swing, the typical stressors that come up for kids – new teachers, new schools, new teams, new friends – are in full motion. But a unique challenge that can arise every 4 years, occurring in lunchrooms, hallways and even on the playgrounds in the fall, is the U.S. presidential election. While every election cycle can bring heightened feelings, this election in particular is filled with charged emotions, and children are observing and absorbing those feelings from home, the media, and their classmates.
Whether related to specific issues, individual candidates, or basic party allegiance – spirited opinions are expected to be heard between children about the presidential race, leading to a new set of emotional stressors for our kids. Disagreements over certain beliefs can be uncomfortable for anyone, but for children who are still growing and developing, and learning their own personal beliefs and ideologies, it can cause stress that can negatively impact their mental health.
So, how do we help our youth navigate this newly elevated issue and learn how to handle conversations that can become uncomfortable?
While the topic may be new discussion in your household, most youth are already learning to manage disagreements in their daily lives. Children manage situations where they don’t agree with one another, sometimes with the help of their caregiver – whether it’s a toddler spat over sharing a toy, or teens disagreeing on where to go to dinner on prom night – so they already have this “muscle” in practice. Now, as their caregiver, you can assist in teaching them about respectful communication, boundaries, and tolerance.
Tips for Caregivers
- Remember that it starts at home. Be mindful of the language you’re using and a heightened sense of tension and anxiety that you may be feeling. Be careful to educate and explain, reminding your children that their friends may have differing opinions about many things, including politics, and why the topic of politics may be more emotionally charged than others.
- Encourage your children to ask questions and talk about what they think, what their friends are saying, and how they’re feeling. In this case, prepare them to hear opinions that they may not agree with and practice how they might choose to respond in a respectful way, even if the situation is difficult. Help them create language to use and role play potential conversations.
- Children will have different levels of knowledge and interest in this topic – be aware of where your child is and guide them accordingly (for instance, remind them that they don’t always need to enter a discussion about their own opinion if they choose not to or if it’s too upsetting).
- Youth often mimic what’s modeled to them by the adults around them without understanding the wider context. It might be appropriate to put boundaries around political discussions with young children, while older adolescents can benefit from learning how to critically think about the information coming at them.
- As children grow and change, they may “try on” new behaviors as a way to exercise their individuality and learn who they are. Don’t be upset or surprised if the child in your care has political views that are different than your own. Sharing beliefs is nice, but don’t insist on what they should or shouldn’t believe in.
- Remind youth that their own behavior and choices are all they can control. It’s okay to disagree with a friend or loved one, and this doesn’t need to cause stress or end a friendship.
- Remind children how to distinguish between differences of opinion and when it is becoming harassment or bullying. Because youth are more sensitive to social status and social influence, we need to help them understand how to tell the difference and reach out for help if needed.
Whether a parent or a youth, when we start to feel anxiety, take some mindful breaths to settle the nervous system. Then ask, “what can I accept about this situation” and “what can I do to feel differently?” The answer will help to change our focus and choice of emotions. Make sure to leave room for discussion with the youth in your care and check-in with them to see how they are feeling throughout the election season.
Nexus Family Healing is a national nonprofit mental health organization that restores hope for thousands of children and families who come to us for community mental health services, foster care and adoption, and residential treatment. For over 50 years, our network of agencies has used innovative, personalized approaches to heal trauma, break cycles of harm, and reshape futures. We believe every child is worth it — and every family matters. Access more resources at nexusfamilyhealing.org/resources.