Once a parent’s rights to their children have been terminated, the chances of them being reinstated can be extremely difficult. Mom Samantha, who hadn’t seen her oldest child Zariyah in three years, was coming to terms with the fact that her oldest daughter may never be in her care again, despite completely turning her life around. “My rights were still terminated to Zariyah…I had to come to this acceptance that I was never going to have her in my care again.”
Samantha lost her parental rights to her two oldest children, Zariyah and her son, because of her substance abuse. Her son was adopted, and Zariyah was placed in foster care. After her third child was born and placed in foster care, Samantha immediately checked herself into a 90-day treatment facility.
Turning Her Life Around
“I learned a lot about taking accountably while in treatment, and I took accountability for what I had done to lead up to losing my kids,” said Samantha, “Everything that they told me to do in that treatment center I tried…I did every suggestion to get out of the grip addiction had on me.”
Samantha successfully completed her treatment program and came home. She instantly connected with her recovery community, attending 360 recovery meetings in just 90 days. She began therapy and surrounded herself with positive people who had similar experiences and made it out. She began volunteering within her community where she could, while also beginning work as a Parent-Mentor for parents trying to reunite with their children.
“I found purpose in my life, which I hadn’t had for so long,” said Samantha, “the people I surrounded myself with spoke love and life into me…my parent mentor told me, ‘Just surround yourself with the winners, and your life will start getting better’… now I get to serve people who are lost and broken and living with no hope, and I get to help be that for them.”
After six months of separation, Samantha’s youngest child was able to come home. Samantha needed a place to live and took a chance – she saw a house for rent, called the owner and explained how her background made it difficult to find housing.
“I was honest with him,” said Samantha, “I told him my background, told him my story, and I signed my lease that very day.”
During her treatment and recovery journey, Samantha never gave up hope and focused her attention on connecting with her two oldest children. She cultivated a relationship with her son’s adoptive mother and fought for visitation rights so she could communicate with Zariyah.
Zariyah had been placed with a potential adoptive family but they ended up not being a good fit. That’s when Kim, who was working with Zariyah’s care team to find a home for her, found out that Samantha was doing well, had her youngest back in her care, had a job, and a place to live.
“We decided to re-look at mom…I called her and started going over some of the challenges Zariyah had been through, and she just got it,” said Kim, “…. Samantha’s ability to process and take responsibility and understand Zariyah’s needs was incredible…she was very responsive and did everything I asked her to do.”
Kim and Nexus-Kindred helped with providing trainings and support for Samantha on trauma-informed care, suggesting she start individual and family therapy, which Samantha readily participated in.
“Kim helped so much,” said Samantha, “anytime I had questions I would just call her…I felt heard by her…she met me where I was at…she validated how I was feeling and actually listened to me.”
Reunited at Last
Against all odds, Samantha was able to have her rights reinstated for Zariyah and bring her home. Less than half of the United States offer reinstatement of parental rights, and even in states that allow it, most petitions fail. Samantha’s was the second petition in the state of Minnesota to succeed and the first in her county.
“Kim reminded me that my past doesn’t dictate who I am,” said Samantha, “it was an amazing experience working with her and Nexus-Kindred.”
Samantha kept going strong with her recovery and managing the stress of navigating the court system, putting herself out into the community, and putting her words into actions. Samantha leaned on her support system, relying on them as well as her faith in God when she was struggling.
“…I leaned on my faith in the Lord, I’d go into prayer,” said Samantha, “…I’d reach out to my support group, my parent-mentor, Kim, and let them know where I was at, and be honest…people can’t help you if you hide things…even when I was struggling with stuff, I would tell my support system where I was at so they could help me navigate what I was going through.”
Samantha’s hard work and persistence paid off, and she was able to connect with Zariyah, beginning with phone calls, then supervised visits and doing a buddy journal they would pass back and forth to each other, slowly getting to know each other again. Eventually Samantha started unsupervised visits with Zariyah, leading to Zariyah living with Samantha again on a trial basis, with Kim continuing to provide support and check in on how they were doing.
Finally, in August of 2024, after separations, treatments, and tons of legal paperwork and communication, Samantha’s rights were officially reinstated, and Zariyah came home for good.
“Never give up…hold yourself accountable to what you did, and be better,” said Samantha, “we have to be able to love ourselves before we can love anybody else, if we aren’t well, our kids aren’t well.”
Building A New Life Together
Zariyah is acclimating well to their new life together, and Samantha is working every day to rebuild the trust she lost with Zariyah.
“Life is going really well,” said Samantha, “Zariyah is doing well in school…she thrives with structure and routine…she loves her little sister.”
As for Samantha’s son, Samantha is discovering a new relationship with him. His adoptive family constantly shares photos and updates. Samantha cherishes the individual time she gets to spend with him like when they go to the movies together, just the two of them.
“It took me a long time to get to a place of acceptance, that my son wouldn’t be coming home, but it’s okay,” said Samantha, “it’s okay that he has two moms, she does so well keeping us connected.”
Today, Samantha works as a Recovery Case Manager and is a certified peer recovery specialist. She is attending school, working towards her bachelor’s in criminal justice, with the goal of becoming a licensed alcohol and drug counselor.
“Working in the child welfare system gave me purpose. I help other parents be reunified with their children…I was using a traumatic part of my life and turned my pain into purpose.”
- Samantha